CONFLICT MANAGEMENT AND RESOLUTION

by Pam Headridge

“Conflict is a normal phenomenon of human interactions and occurs in all relationships. It can be the catalyst for important new ideas, new ways of doing ...... However, too much conflict in an organization can lead to loss of focus and fragmented activity, while the prolonged absence of conflict is usually a sign of stagnation or apathy. What people really need is the ability to recognize conflict for what it is and to develop positive means to deal with it.”*

HOW TO AVOID CONFLICT

BE ORGANIZED
Have a parent and cheerleader meeting before try-outs and again after try-outs.
Put all expectations in writing and have both parent and cheerleader sign a copy and keep a copy.
Have a calendar of events and schedule.

ON A PERSONAL LEVEL
Set aside personal differences and conflicts
Keep the group goal uppermost in your mind. Focus on common goals.
Put yourself in the other’s position and think of 3 good reasons for that point of view
Make everything you say or do positive.
It is ok to disagree with ideas but not with people.


CONFLICT RESOLUTION

Identify and state the problem/conflict
Express your concerns/feelings with “I” statements not “you” statements.
Listen to understand -- never to interrupt.
Check that you understand by briefly repeating what you heard in your own words.
It is ok to laugh with each other but not at each other.
Final resolution is achieved when
a, apologies are exchanged, and/or
b. reconciliation occurs, and/or
c. everyone reaches a solution that they can “live with” and
d. the solution allows the group to proceed.


TECHNIQUES FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION

BALL OF STRING
While sitting in a circle, pass a ball of string from one member to another. The rules are only the person with the string can talk. After everyone has had their turn to speak and share their feelings, there will be a web of string. This web illustrates the interconnected nature of group process. Everything they do and say affects the team.
Set the rules prior to starting the activity
Use “I” statements to demonstrate feelings.
Do NOT allow the attack of persons.
Keep restating that it is the behavior that is making others uncomfortable, not the person themselves.

REFLECTIVE LISTENING
Have squad members practice listening to the feelings of others and then reflectively paraphrase the other’s feelings.
The person’s whose feelings paraphrased responds to the accuracy of the reflective listener.


SAY 4 THINGS ABOUT THE SQUAD
As the squad sits in a circle, inform them that you have 4 questions/statements that you would like them to respond to one at a time. Give each member a certain amount of time to complete the answers.
Say one positive item about the squad.
What is something you would like to work on in your squad?
What item does your squad need to work on? How can this be improved?
What is something you’ve learned at camp that you would like to try?

FEELING CARDS
While sitting in a circle,on the floor, set out Feeling cards. Feeling Cards can created by using index cards. Label each card with one positive and one negative emotion that the squad could be experiencing. The number of cards used can be determined by the size of the squad. Tell the team members to reach out and take one card that relates to how they are feeling. Once all member have a feeling card they will, one at a time, explains why they are feeling that way. Cards can read ANGRY, SATISFIED, TIRED, HURT, HAPPY, PROUD, FRUSTRATED, INSPIRED, EXCITED, PEPPY, CONFUSED, STRESSED, DETERMINED.


RESOURCES:

 * Respect Incorporated
3706 Old Capitol Trail
Wilmington, DE 19808

More Than Pom Pons and Pyramids,
Washington Association of Secondary School Principals

Jim Thompson, 1995
Positive Coaching
Ward Publishers, Inc